love

Candid shot for them !

RENNthai

Andrew !

Devil , Zombie & Angel !

the cute lil boy on boat & Faith

the Scary School girl & angel

the two couple being romantic over there

Hilary & her boy
Devil & Pirate
*he even try to rob the food from the table beside us -.-
haha

Our Cruise

My Polariod (:
loves

2455 !

Our Supper

Dad & Me

muacks !

I'm back !
wasnt a vacation , but just to settle some stuff up there
basically , Me & Ruth are just doing nothing everyday
this trip was tough , have to face the reality once again

face her death . getting nearer to her presence
feeling her once again and its just making me missing her even more

i felt sorry for everything we're having now
& have to leave him for days !
thats was intolerable
although it was a wasted trip ,
cause we didnt got to enjoy much
and we didnt manage to get back my mum belongings
lucky mum's blessing us ,
dad strike lottery over there (:
we were jumping in joy there , haha
got a Polaroid camera !
this few days been sticking with him
went for my Halloween party yestersday !
on cruise (: w sis and her boyfriend
but was a big disappointment
the food as well as the cruise
maybe i should call it on a ferry ?
and met edmund & seong hoon to chill at villa bali
(: Nice chilling out with them

loves

I'm glad to have you here when i'm falling apart
loving you wasnt all about the responsibility
and it isnt a tiring thing at all
its just something i'm willing to commit to
i never felt this way before ,
I'm certain its love ,
never did expect leaving you for days would be so terrible
i used to laugh at friends around me crying over their loved ones
leaving them for days and now thanks to you i finally know how terrible was it to part
i just want to do everything with you
being with you everyday isnt a sick thing at all
we never expect any chemistry between us
thinking back on how much we used to loathe each other in the past (:
love you baby

i'm leaving to Genting tonight (:
i'm afraid yet hoping to get some response
nowadays ,i'm missing her so badly
every min , every sec
i'm thinking how my life gonna be without her
and trying to hold back my tears
everything is reminding me of her
i just cant seem to control my emotion
mood is greatly affected by it
i just cant seem to get myself up now
i'm screwing things up ,
i'm sorry to disappoint everyone
its hard to be always strong , and i just need your understanding
did volunteer work yestersday !
well , was me and my sister very first time ,
bringing kids to the park and stuff
a new experience
was really excited about it , i just get the satisfaction out of it
thanks cindy for having me and my sis into this
we brought the kids to hort park ,
and i was surprised to know this place
i didnt even know singapore have such a nice park !
with all the nicely planted flowers and weird plants
we brought the kids around the park , and have some games with them (:
next stop , Orphanage !
met daryl , thanks for the flower dear
was abit surprised , but kinda expected it !
haha , went to catch coffin with his friends
it was a disappointment
we have a had time deciding our dinner

lol , but end up both of us went to vivo
wanted to watch song of the sea but was full by the time we reach :(
we end up having marche there
saw a toy puddle , its too cute for us to resist
next year , ruth promised to get a dog !


love

thanks to Jy for that

& the Hotcakes -.-
he found it nicer that way
but it taste the same

Visit Mum yestersday
i'm worried
tears just fall
last few days , i was really feeling better
no more sleepless night , no more tears in the night
everything seems alright ,
perhaps making myself busy does help a lil ?
but looking at mum's picture aches my heart
i yearn to hear her calling me darling once more
thinking of our trip , wont it be different without you
without you home ,you aint there to cook for dad
everything different , you aint there to create more mess at home
dad is finding going home redundant cause we are not around most of the time
and i'm trying to accompany dad more
probably thats what i can do the most
you are just so important , but we never knew till you left
what i regret the most ,
was not being there with you at your last moment
not even a last word from me when you left
i didnt even get to send you off
and i never got to see you before you left
it was just a word from an annoymous phone that you left
its the first time my body went numb
my hands are shaking
and the last time we went out
all the words i said was hurtful
i'm really sorry
we even plan to give you a surprise when you are back
how worried i was for the past few days
when you aint back ,
you are always there to help me , siding me at home
you are always giving excuses for me to save me from doing all the chores at home
i know no matter how much i'm saying wont bring you back
but i just want let you know how much i misses you
how much i hate myself for being really useless
devasted deep inside
mum , i'm really sorry :(
Chalet on Saturday
daryl's friends
i was odd , but lucky i met wendy
quite random , cause it was years since i last met her
and everything just so coincidence
didnt expect myself to stay up till morning
the wine and lamb goes well !
and i gobble up most of the it
opps ,maybe i haven have it for long
i'm having cravings for wine ,
and finally i'm meeting bitch tomorrow
just hope that we could enjoy in the night
and manjong yestersday ,
my luck is always bad on that
i'm always on the losing side
halloween party this firday on cruise !
i'm really excited about it (:
i'm still thinking of my custome ..
thanks guys for all the encouragement left on my tagboard !
ballet & my japanese class , all i can do is to wait for a good school
loves

Amelia & Faith
( look at my tan face :( )

kisses my love


Our Sweet Sweet First Kissssssssssss (:

haven met candice for days
nowadays , we haven meet really often !

lol , she's busy with her own life & work ya
i miss her (:
i miss chilling with ya bitch !
and now everyone is busy with their work or school
basically i'm doing nothing everyday
waiting for my resume to be accepted
so i would be really busy
i'm contradicting myself !
i just complained for being really busy last few days
cause of the coaching , and stuff -.-
met amelia yestersday !
its been really long since we went out
first time after years ?
got my Jay's album (:
i'm so obessed over it !
infront of her i'm just a idoit

cause no matter whats she talking
i'll be like , whats that
oh my god , i really learn alot going out with her
haha , we gonna meet up often ya girl
pass me more general knowledge so i wont embarassed myself infront of others

we went town , it have been really long since i went far east
so we went to this shop , which is really new to me
thats sell ice desert , but i was having cravings for ice cream
we have our first kiss there
opps*
you would know why if you went
so you could imagine , i dont ever know that when she mention this shop
haha , so i was a total bimbo but thats only infront of her !
we walk the whole town yestersday (:
^.- loveyou girl
met qirui for dinner before my manjong
we haven meet for really long !
and he's busy with his work now
suppose to meet amelia this morning as well for a big supermarket shopping !
but i'm too tired

nowadays i been really languid ,
last night went manjong with darlyn and his friends
i'm totally a noob infront of him ,
and they dont play cents but dollars
i felt being con , haha
but they been really lenient to me (:
i want to skate but i'm just lazy to leave home now
i finally jailbreak my iphone , which only took edmund one day to do so
my luck is always bad , it took me really days to finally did it
and i'm suppose to be able to download the applications before of him
but he manage to do it !
i'm better guys , thanks alot for your comments and encouragement
i felt it (:
i'm getting better ?




P.S could i embrace in your arms again , and feel your love

its been 2week
my mood has been affected greatly yet i have to put on a smile
i wish i can be a grown up and maybe just move on
but i just need time to heal my wound before i can stand up again
its never easy to start a different life , with just you being even independent
without someone always been there for you and who has been
waking you up every day , getting you breakfast , waiting for you back in the night
accompany you to the bus stop , loving you , giving you all her love
someone so close and always here all this years
though out there , i always know there are people who are more unfortunate
but even knowning it may just cheer me up a lil , thinking i'm still a lucky person
but it never make it easier for someone to get used or accept a loved ones death
i wish it could be so easy
all the tears i been enduring just fall
my tears just kept slipping down my face
trying to get myself stop but i just cant help it
its the third time since i cried after her death
i think i'm really doing well
i'm still staying in a place with her presence everywhere
i'm trying to make myself occupied

not being home in the night ,
but coming back home its really hard
she's isnt there waiting , she isnt there accompanying me
isnt there to switch off all the lights
every moment , dad is talking about mum
i know he's missing her alot and is hurting me inside as well
now he's all alone ,
all this emotion aint just mere words could descirbe
been coaching for this few days
got myself really tanned now !
and now i'm down with a bad cold
but i still went to coach cause being at home would make it worst
though ill , but still went on with the guys
we went siglap to play lan
and i actually went
haven play for long , and jocelyn was nice
lucky she's there for the few days during the class
if not i'll be really bored
cause i dont know most of them there
went to catch movie with dad and sis last few days ,
Eagle Eye , love it !
its really nice ,
and thats what we never do till you left
and finally i preorder the Jay's Album
i'm finally collecting it today

Ruth's Surrpise Chalet for boyfriend !


Done by me & candice (:

really cute cupcakes !
cant even bear to bite it

staying at home alone would be the hardest thing i could do
memories of her seem to be flashing in my mind
i really wish she's here
would time just stop on the day she left for the trip
everything would be different
she would still be here with us ,
being there for us
i just want to feel her presence right now
i want to feel her love once again
its really aching me deep inside
crying deep inside every moment
when i pass by places of her memories , its hurts me
whenever i saw childrens with mothers being with them
i'm envying , cause i would never have her love
its gonna be the first thing i would want now
her love
every single night
i'm missing you so badly


my jazz technique screwed up as well :(
now i could only pin on hope on amelia's ballet school
thanks girl , you been really sweet !
loves
got to pin on her on my japanese school as well
Jay's album finally out !


P.S I need you back badly

''Trying aint the start , Giving up aint the end ,
Persevering is the only way to know the outcome'' -YongDa

the sight of tomorrow seems so dark
i just want to spend my day to the fullest
i began to do ridiculous things just to make myself happy
i'm trying hard to live my life alone all the time
waking up in the empty house, having a meaningless day ahead
i dreamt of you coming back home almost everynight
and its was just a dream that you left us
its so real in the dream ,
i was relief at the moment that everything was just a nightmare
but waking up realising that i was just having a dream
was really awful
my life is changing
my nights are terrible , i cant sleep knowing you aint around
i didnt know it gonna get so worst
in a way we are getting a better life cause of everything
but in another way , i dont think so at all
i would rather abandoned all the plan ahead
and want you back
celebrate my sis birthday for the last two days
her countdown at St James with her colleague
and yestersday , went to shop with her
but went to visit my mom first
the seventh day after her wake
it was dumb
as the both of us were chanting something we dont even understand
and we were just trying hard to read the chinese word
but its the thoughts that count
and we went to have dessert first before our restuarant opened
the dessert was fanstastic !
had dinner at En -Japanese Dining Bar @ Mohd Sultan!
its extremely nice and worthwhile spending as well as waiting for one and a half hour before its opened (:
and went vivo !
for the sales , but for the entire time we are stuck at Tangs
brought a wallet for dad (:
i'm happy for him , cause is choosen by me
i know he's smiling inside
P.S Mom i miss you so so much


''whenever you give up you are only creating more regrets in your life
when you look back in your life , you will think about the times you give up and wish you have try harder but if you have put in your best effort and did your best ,then you can look back and tell yourself well you tried , there's nothing more to regret
although it make me stand up and get back to my desk to work hard
but when i start working hard , i would think about ''-Gerald